How to stop internal friction and learn to love oneself?

In recent years, a psychological concept known as "internal friction" or “mental burnout” has gained popularity. Although not a new term, it has become more relevant as people grow more aware of their mental and emotional health. So what exactly is this “internal friction”? In simple terms, it refers to excessive, unproductive mental activity that leads to anxiety, lack of motivation, low self-esteem, emotional sensitivity, and pessimism.

Common signs of mental burnout include:

1. Overthinking: Difficulty making decisions, even about small things like what to eat for lunch, often leads to indecision and frustration.

2. Thinking more than doing: You mentally rehearse situations and outcomes over and over, but struggle to take action.

3. Lack of drive: Tasks get postponed, and even with outside pressure, it’s hard to meet deadlines or stay productive.

4. Emotional sensitivity and self-blame: You dwell on what others think of you, especially negative feedback — even if it’s vague or imagined — and take it personally.

5. Constant analysis of past events: If something doesn’t go as planned, you endlessly revisit it, wondering “what if.”

6. Assuming the worst: You frequently imagine negative outcomes — like forgetting an umbrella and getting soaked, or fearing rejection before even making a move.

7. Perfectionism: You strive to get everything just right, and even the smallest slip-ups make you anxious and uncomfortable.

These patterns amount to unnecessary mental drama — overplaying scenarios in your mind and exhausting your emotional resources. Over time, they can impact your overall quality of life.

So, how can you break free from this internal struggle?

1. Stop overthinking — make decisions quickly: When you're caught in indecision, try flipping a coin, picking randomly, or following someone else’s advice. Start training yourself to act without always second-guessing. You may find that quick decisions aren’t as risky as they seem.

2. Act more, think less: Free yourself from excessive mental loops and shift your focus to doing. Don’t overanalyze — just go eat, start the task, or enjoy your evening. Follow instructions at work without overcomplicating them. Let simple actions replace exhausting deliberation.

3. Shift from self-blame to objectivity: Learn to evaluate situations more rationally. Ask yourself — did you actually do something wrong, or are you just being overly sensitive? Keep in mind that not every opinion is valid or deserves your attention.Celebrate what you’ve done well and build confidence gradually.

4. Let go of the past: No amount of overthinking will change what’s already happened. Try not to replay old events obsessively. Shift your attention to the actions you can take in the present moment.Keep moving forward, adjusting as needed, and give yourself permission to learn and grow without fixating on past mistakes.

5. Replace pessimism with positive expectations: It’s natural to worry, but train your mind to anticipate better outcomes. For example, if you're afraid your partner may not be loyal, remind yourself that the negative examples you’ve seen in the media don’t define your own relationship. Seek out and focus on positive stories to build a more hopeful outlook.

6. Avoid energy-draining people: Distance yourself from those who constantly bring negativity. Choose to be around those who motivate you, bring positivity, and make you feel alive.Your emotional environment matters — choose a social circle that supports your mental health.

7. Embrace imperfection: Let go of the need to be perfect. Understand that perfection doesn't exist — and what you see as flawed may already be more than enough in others' eyes. Accepting imperfection helps you move forward with peace and resilience.

In Summary

Mental burnout is not something you’re stuck with — it’s a state of mind that can be changed. By adjusting your thinking and taking deliberate action, you can ease the emotional burden it causes. The key is to identify the specific ways it shows up in your life and then intentionally shift those habits. When you start treating yourself with patience and care, you’ll find that learning to love yourself isn’t just an idea — it’s a daily, practical path to inner calm.